Peek a Boo Boo
by chieripot
Summary: UPDATED! Funny things that might have happened to our characters ... Kyoto Arc! ... Insanity ahead. You've been warned! R, L (laugh) & R!
1. Part I

**Peek a Boo Boo**

By Anime no Miko

-----//----//----//------

Kenshin (whispering):  "Ano ... Anime no Miko-dono, I don't think your idea is _completely _original."

Anime no Miko (thinking):  _'Hmm.  He's right.  I mean, Kenshin _should_ know.  Yeah, it has probably been done before.  But hey, what the hell!'  _(laughing here all cynically) "Don't worry, Kenshin dear, mine will be WAY better! Muahaha!"

Kenshin (gulping):  "Oro?"

AnM:  "Yeah.  Plus, I'm the Director.  You can't get any better, ne?"

Kazuhiro Furuhashi (popping out):  "Now missy, you _can't_ do that.  That's MY job!"

[Anime no Miko jumps onto Kenshin's lap frightened out by Furuhashi's sudden materialization next to her, and Kenshin ... he goes  'oro' again.]

Tsuji Hajiki (popping out too):  "What do you mean _your_ job, That's MY job, you moron!  You dealt _only_ with the OAVs.  It was _me_ who did the great series episodes!"

AnM (waving a mace):  "Hey, you two!  Yes, _you_.  Next time ring the door bell first, understood?!"

Kenshin (musing aloud):  "I think there isn't a door bell, that I think."

AnM (narrowing eyes):  "Kenshin..."

Kenshin (retreating discretetly):  "Oro...?"

AnM (yelling sweetly):  "Stay out of this, OKAY?"

Tsuji Hajiki, Kazuhiro Furuhashi:  "Yeah!!  

Kazuhiro Furuhashi:  "Go do the laundry meanwhile!"

Tsuji Hajiki:  "What laundry?!  Go kill somebody!"  

Kenshin (protesting):  "Demo, Hajiki-san, Furuhashi-san, I was trying to ..."

Watsuki-sensei (yea, popping out too! yelling over the rest):  "All of you, shut up!  I'm _the_ god here.  RK is MY creation after all, in case you've forgotten.  To play around with my work, the nerves!"

[Anime no Miko, Hajiki and Furihashi look at each other and nod.  Kenshin is clueless, as always.]

AnM, Hajiki, Furihashi (sticking tongue out):  "Yeah, but you also sold the rights, remember?  So ... HA-HA! Deal with it!!"

Watsuki-sensei (turning red):  "Why you three lil' scoundrels.  I'm gonna---!"

Kenshin:  "Uhh... Oh, minna-dono ..."

AnM, Watsuki, Hajiki, Furihashi (snapping):  "What?!"

Kenshin (pointing):  "The rest of the cast has just arrived."

// Yeah, you can SKIP this ... //

[The Kenshin-gumi (Kaoru, Yahiko, Sanosuke, Megumi, ), the Oniwabanshuu (Aoshi, Misao, Okina, Hannya, Shikijo, Beshimi, Hyottoko, Omasu, Okon, Shiro, Kuro), the Juppongatana (Shishio, Hoji, Yumi, Soujiro, Usui, Anji, Kamatari, Henya, Saizuchi and Fuji, Iwanbo, Chou),  the Shisengumi (Saitou, Okita, Nagakura, Matsubara, Takeda, Inoue, Tani, Toudou, Suzuki, Harada), the Yukishiros (Tomoe, Enishi), the Seikihoutai (Souzo, Tsunan, et al), the Six Comrades (Inui, Otowa, Kurianami, Gein, Yatsume, Wu Heishin), Sushin-the four gods (Seiryu, Suzaku, Byakko, Genbu),  the Filler-Characters (Yutarou, Shuura, Tetsuma, Daigoro, Itsuko, Misanagi, the Black Knights, Shougo, Shouzo, Sayo, Jinpu, et al) and the Adopt-Me-I-Don't-Have-A-Group (Tae, Tsubame, Ayame and Suzume, Dr. Genzai, Kawaji, et al) 

 // ... Up till HERE //

{all the RK anime/manga cast} walk in resembling a herd of sheep with no herdsman ...]

Notaro {the big fat, hairy dog Sano found}:  "WOOF! Woof! Woof!  WooF!"  _*translation ... "Hey!  Am I invisible or what?  I'm leading those crazy folks!  I'm their herdsman!"*_

_[(to Notaro)  You're wrong.  You are a dog.  And what a thief dog!]_

Notaro:  "WOOF! WOOFFFF!"  _*translation ... "** beep-beep**"...*_

[Kenshin starts counting heads and goes dizzy.  AnM, Watsuki, Hajiki, and Furihashi stop their little argument and stare eyes wide at the human ball getting closer and closer.]

Kenshin (@_@):  "... this place is getting smaller ..."

Shishio (igniting his sword):  "The strong live, the weak die.  I was the strongest but _you_ made _me_ die in the hands of Battousai.  Made a joke of me!  Now my revenge comes!"

Kamatari (taking out pom poms):  ".. gimme an S, gimme an H, gimme an I, repeat those three, gimme an O!!  S-H-I-S-H-I-O.  Shishio!!!  Rah Rah Rah!!"

Yumi (rolling eyes):  "Disgusting."

Misao (clinging to Aoshi):  _'Nobody is getting near MY Aoshi-sama, especially not THAT phenomenon.'_

Aoshi :  "..."

Shishio (igniting his sword):  "I'll take revenge on you, despicable weaklings! Mua-ahahaha!!!"

AnM (moving apart from W, H, F):  "Now, Shishio.  I haven't done anything to you"  (to herself) _'not yet'_  "They are the ones you are after! Go get them!"  (pointing at W, H, F)

[Watsuki, Hajiki and Furihashi retreat to a corner, sweating.  Reaching for the emergency exit, they give not at all plausible excuses for leaving and run for their lives ...]

Shishio (going after them):  "Hey!  Where do you think you're going?  Cowards!"

Hoji (consulting his pocket watch):  "Shishio-sama is the strongest!  We'll take over Japan and build a new era."

AnM (shaking head):  "Crazy Kyoto Arc villians.  No, not you Sou-chan! ^___^  Okay, guys.  Let's get down to business!"

[RK cast groans not liking the idea of their fans making fun of them, but nonetheless goes on with the fic since they are at the time jobless.]

AnM (handing out scripts):  "Now minna, kindly memorize your lines so that we can all have a good laugh at your expenses."  (laughing by herself like crazy)

[AnM tosses her braid over her shoulder, puts on her new beret, walks across the room and sits on a chair gold labeled 'Director.']

AnM (speaking over the loudspeaker):  "First group, follow me.  I say, why aren't you moving?  Don't give me that look.  It isn't _that_ bad.  MOVE, I SAID!!"  (mumbling)  "Geez!  One would think I'm sending them to meet death ... death of their dignity, that is."

 ~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~ 

Manga Part 53  -  A Call and Answer

Anime Episode 30  -  Evil Monster of Revenge... Shishio Makoto's Plot!

//// --Scene 01-- ////

[Kenshin lies crouched on the floor supporting himself by the sword jammed into the wood.  As he slowly brings his breath under control, his ponytail gets loose.  Long red locks cascade over his back and peep over his shoulders.  Kenshin wipes off the blood running down his mouth and gazes fiercely at Saitou ... eyes flicking violet-amber.  Saitou is about to charge again with his Gatotsu ...]

Kenshin (still breathing heavily):  "Ma-Matte!"

AnM (over the loudspeaker):  _"CUT!!"_

[Saitou stops in mid-air and lands heavily on the floor with a single tap from his charol shoes.]__

Saitou:  "You'd better have a good reason for interrupting my Gatotsu.  I could have gotten a cramp on the foot."__

AnM:  _What's the matter, Kenshin?_

Kenshin (picking up the hair band):  "I need another of this."

[A vanity box tied with fishing string is lowered from the ceiling and placed next to Kenshin.  The red-head opens it to find a variety of hair accessories, all the colors and sizes imaginable.  His eyes grow wide and he sits on the floor with the box on his lap.]

AnM:  _C'mon, Kenshin.  We are waiting!!  Saitou, did I say you could take a break?  Put that cigarette away!  No thank you, I don't want one.  Kenshin, just pick one for goodness sake!_

Kenshin (scratching his head):  "Demo, I don't know which one to choose.  They are all so pretty ... Oro!  This one glitters!  And this other has our faces on it!"__

Saitou (standing behind Kenshin):  "I told you for years, but no, you wouldn't listen.  Kept letting that hair grow like weed.  Look at mine.  Nice, healthy, practical _and _short.  Save problems like this." __

AnM:  _Kenshin, just pick one for goodness' sake!  Didn't mean to yell at you.  Fine, fine.  I understand.  Saitou help him out, would ya?_

Kenshin:  "What do you say, pink to go with my gi color or white to go with my hakama?"

Saitou (narrowing his eyes):  "That's a tough one."

//// --Scene 02-- ////

[Saitou prepares to charge his Gatotsu with his broken sword, but Battousai knocks the sword out of his hand.  Megumi and Sanosuke comment on the move.]

Battousai:  "So the Shisengumi choose honor over life . . . That's all right with me."

[Saitou hits Battousai's hand with his belt and the reverse blade goes flying ...]

Megumi:  "The belt from his uniform?!"

[Yeap, boys and girls (and middle terms).  Saitou used the belt from his uniform, from his pants, to be more precisely.]

Yahiko:  "When did he—"

[When you blinked, that's when he did it.  Amazing the ingenuity and speed of the Miburo, isn't it?] 

Saitou (pummeling Battousai):  "I have you!"

Megumi:  "Ken-san!"

Sanosuke:  "He's in trouble now!  Without his sword Kenshin doesn't have a chance--"

Saitou:  "With this ..."

[Saitou whips off his jacket and pulls it around Battousai's throat, lifting him off the floor, intending to strangle him.]

Saitou:  "--- it's over!"

[Oh, yes!  It's over ... over for Saitou!  Apparently due to all the emotion and adrenaline in the air he forgot he hadn't had breakfast that morning and so, he trips over his pants and falls face flat onto the floor with a loud thud, dragging Battousai with him.] 

 Kaoru (turning red _but_ staring):  "Hentai!"

AnM (drooling):  _"Saitou, you've got sexy legs!"  (whacks herself)  "I meant to say, what the hell you think you're doing?  Striptease?!  CUT!!"_

Megumi (fox ears popping):  "Ohohoho!  The psycop uses nice boxers with Marlboro cigarettes designs on it."

//// --Scene 03-- ////

Coming soon ...__

~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~

Shishio:  "I'm back.  Where is everyone to welcome the great Shishio?!"

AnM (fanning herself with the script booklet):  "Did you get them?"

Shishio (looking away):  "I decided to let them live.  Weren't worth my time."  

AnM (raising an eyebrow):  "Oh..?"

Shishio (thinking):  _'Easy to look at me like that.  Geez!  Battousai wouldn't be able to do anything against their big rubber-like weapon (a.k.a. eraser) either.'_

-----//----//----//------

Translations from the manga taken from maigo-chan.org!  (makes peace sign)  Watsuki-sensei, Hajiki-san & Furuhashi-san, SMILE you were on Peek a Boo-Boo and More!!  (Hai, it sounds better the other way … BUT oh so dear ff.net took it down for having the word bl _ _ _ _ _ ….!!!!  Minna-san, don't be loose tongue, onegai! _ And ff.net, give me a break please!  *has been sanctioned twice!* )  

Remember to R & L & R & … L &  … L!!  LOL!  If you didn't laugh, I promise to quit. _


	2. Part II

Peek a Boo Boo

By Anime no Miko

-----//----//----//------

Not mine, but not yours either! Muahuaha!

~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~ 

Manga Part 99, 100  -  The Great Kyoto Fire

Anime Episode 46  -  Blown Away!  The Battleship Rengoku, stopping its sails!

//// --Scene 03-- //// 

[At the harbor, where Shishio's ship is, a carriage approaches at great speed.  It is a fairly strange carriage for a monkey is crouched on top of it!  Oh wait, as it comes even closer, you see it is not a monkey but a big, white hen ... rooster, I said rooster!  Sagara Sanosuke "to the rescue!!!"]

Sanosuke (leaping again to evade Saitou's stab up through the roof of the carriage):  "Saitou, you bastard ... !"

Saitou:  "Damn, I missed."

Kenshin (patting the Miburo):  "Years do make you rusty, ne?"

Saitou (narrowing eyes):  "I missed because I _wanted  to miss.  I can easily stab that baka.  Can't say the same of you, now, can we?"_

Kenshin (drawing out his sword):  "Alright."

[And so, Kenshin and Saitou engage in a fierce competition to stab poor Sano, who only Kami knows how escapes the proving stabs. ]

AnM (standing up):  "Kenshin!  Saitou!"

[The swordsmen stop.  Kenshin blinks at what he was doing ....]

AnM:  "I can't believe you.  How could you miss that repeatedly times!"

Sanosuke:  "What the hell—"

//// --Scene 04-- ////

[Aboard the Rengoku.  A soldier peers out through a spyglass. Suddenly--]

Soldier:  "Lord Houji!"

Houji:  "Have the fires started?"

Soldier:  "N—no, there's a carriage. It's coming amazingly fast!"

[Kenshin, Saitou and Sanosuke stand at the harbor watching all the ships, trying to find Shishio's.]

Sanosuke:  "Which one, Kenshin? Which one is Shishio's ship!"

[There is a long silence.  Everybody waits for Kenshin's line.  Silence.  Finally Kenshin makes a move … he frowns and scratches his head.] 

_( AnM:  "Kenshin!  Say your line!  What's the matter with you?  You what??  I could understand that from Sano, but you?!  (No offense, Sano)  Kenshin, how could you forget which one is the Rengoku!  For goodness' sake, Soujiro is even waving at us!!  It's that wooden ship!" )_

Saitou (saying his line as AnM says Kenshin's):  "All right, stop it!"

AnM (sweatdroping):  "CUT!  Saitou ... you can take a break while I talk to Kenshin here.  No smoking though!"

//// --Scene 05-- ////

Coming soon … 

~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~

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Translations from the manga taken from maigo-chan.org!  All the modifications and additions made with no intention to offend.  AnM only wants to make you R, L (laugh) & R.

Note:  I write with no set order, but what comes to my mind at the moment.  If you would like a particular volume part or anime episode to be done, leave a review with the titles (or describe the episode) and I'ld gladly comply with your request.  ^___^


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